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Next Issue: Everyone hoping 9/11 cover-up is true Editor going to kick next person who says "GOOOOAAAL!" US reluctantly re-accepts Carter Britney porn debut set for 2004 $40 billion ad research program results in "Tobacco is Whacko" Yo Mamma jokes not nearly as funny at orphanage 'Moby coolest thing ever', announces MTV Mafia kingpin Joseph Bonanno dead of natural causes at age 97, proving crime doesn't pay Lame rockstars pushing lame philosophy |
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